I started off today in the dark, waking up on my downstairs couch at 7:30am. No, I did not drown myself in soju last night making it impossible to climb my loft ladder but rather I find the narrowness of the couch's sleeping space more suitable for getting me up and going in the wee morning hours.
Shivering from the cold I darted into my shower hoping to warm up. Not having time to turn on the water heater (as we have to do when entering/leaving the shower) beforehand, the warmest temperature I got was slightly above luke warm. . .nothing to pleasurable but certainly shocking nonetheless. I jumped out of the shower hoping to find warmth under the small excuse of my towel, but couldn't. Still shivering violently, I wondered again why exactly did I have to wake up so early to go to a parent teacher meeting that I had no clue about?
I dressed in my 'nicest' clothes, meaning dark pants, black shoes and a shirt that I had intentionally steam pressed in the shower the day before. No tie to speak of as I either lost the only one that I thought I brought in my last apartment or, forgot to bring it all together. . .this seems insignificant though trust me, it was not!
Nate and I met downstairs at eight a.m. sharp to grab a cab for Hagye station. . .no point waiting for the bus when it comes only every 10 minutes or so and takes at least 15 to get to the station. A taxi on the other hand is usually always available as a line builds up at the crosswalk just outside of Dootvill. Not this morning however! We stood in the morning cold for a good ten minutes (I know, don't you just feel terrible for me), before finally hailing down an empty taxi. . .must've been some sort of union holiday or something!
With an hour subway ride ahead, I figured I could grab a pretty decent nap on the way to Daechi. As the train pulled into the station however it was obvious that no such nap was to be had. Nate and I pushed our way into an already over flowing subway car and then were pushed from behind as more people clamored on board. At the next half dozen or so stops no one got off but people continued to get on in the following manner. They would approach an obviously already uncomfortable subway car, turn their backs to the crowd at the door, step on and jam themselves in using the door frame for leverage.
For those closest to the door they could either oblige by showing their indifference, or disagree by throwing the person out. Unfortunately I have yet to see anybody take the second option. So, those of us stuck in the middle simply drew closer and closer together. While I'm sure everyone's been in some sort of uncomfortably crowded situation before, I cannot recall an instance when I have ever experienced this type of human density before. . .and let me tell you, it is nothing nice!
We eventually escape the terror of Line 7 by transferring to Line 3, headed south east, at the Express Bus Terminal. From there, we rode in relative luxury the twenty minutes to Daechi Station where we surfaced via Exit 1 as Joseph had instructed us to do so. Emerging from the subway we noticed the area looked somewhat unfamiliar. Stopping to look around we found what we believed to be the main branch on an opposite corner. Why do I say believed? Well, because last time we had a 'workshop' it was held at the new Main Branch which was the building that we had just visually located. . .as we were headed to a meeting at the Main Branch, we figured that two buildings were the same. . .not so.
Up on the sixth floor of the new Main Branch we were surprised by the absolute lack of activity. . .no one was there. Cautiously we poked our heads around until a teacher came down one of the hallways looking surprised. Why are you here, she asked us. Um, for the parent teacher meeting, we responded. Oh, but that's at the Main Branch. Wait, but, isn't this the Main Branch!? No, this is the New Main Branch, follow me, I'm on my way there!
So, back outside we followed our kind informant (Jenny maybe, I forget) down a couple blocks and across the street to the Main Branch; a building in which we had first met Yumi and Mr. Lee that we had believed to be closed with the opening of what we thought was a new Main Branch. . .not the New Main Branch! On the way, Jenny asked us, seemingly jokingly, if we were ready to dance and sing, to which I sarcastically responded of course. . .having no clue that she in fact asking a question, not making a joke!
Up the elevator to the fourth floor we were greeted by a long line of Korean teachers wearing smiles and big DYB buttons. We were quickly ushered around the corner and in to a Native Room where two young women, clearly fellow FT's, were waiting. We first introduced ourselves to Susie and Tiffany before inquiring as to why exactly we were here. Tiffany quickly responded: Oh, well you're attractive obviously. Probably because you're tall, with light hair and eyes. Um, excuse me, that's kind of what I thought, but only jokingly, what is it that we're expected to do? Well, you'll be standing in a line greeting the mothers as they come in for the meeting, then we'll probably have to do a skit or a song of something. Oh. Good to know, thanks.
This is not a joke. Nate and I were in a room with two young, attractive, non-Korean women, Susie from Canada and Tiffany from the beautiful Crescent City herself, expected to play the role of two, young, attractive, non-Korean males. Tiffany informed us that we were to be DYB "mascots" because we were some of the most attractive FT's and that's who they wanted the Korean mothers to see while visiting for their parent/teacher meeting. This is absurd. . . there're currently over 70 FT's in the DYB system and they selected us?! I mean, I've always known I have beautiful eyes but this is too much!
While still trying to figure out exactly what our role was Mr. Lee barged in to say good morning. The first thing that he did was take one look at me and note that I had a different hairstyle. This is only somewhat true. I would say, I have no hairstyle as I haven't gotten it cut since arriving in Seoul. Why you ask? Don't worry about it, I've never been big on hair cuts and will likely get one soon although it sure feels nice having the extra warmth up top in the winter time! Mr. Lee thought for a moment trying to describe my ruffles up top (which yes, were freshly cleaned this morning) before landing on just the right word, 'lion' he said. Yes Mr. Lee, I look like a lion, thank you for noticing.
The four of us were then ushered out in to the hallway to begin our meet and greet without the meet. On the way out the door Mr. Lee noticed that I did not have a tie on, for reasons that, if you've made it this far, you probably already know. He looked frantic then quickly slipped his off and handed it to me, insisting that I wear one, ignoring my pleas against wearing a candy cane stripped tie with rhinestones over a light blue and purple shirt. Mr. Lee insisted that color did not matter but to be sure to return the tie to him as it was a very expensive one. I assured him that I would before slipping it over my head and zipping it up. Yes, it was a zip up tie as in the kind that one can purchase in the subway station for something around 5,000 won. . .most expensive indeed!
In the hallway we were shifted from wall to wall before landing in the long line of Koreans that had initially greeted us as we stepped out of the elevator. Nate and I were pleased to see Moon Young Teacher standing in line, as she has this week moved branches to Daechi (a phenomenon that I will get around to explaining at some point, I swear). Standing in between Nate and I, teeny little Moon Young felt so uncomfortable that she eventually had to move. . .oh well, we tried to be friendly!
As mothers came up the elevator we would greet them with a bow and combination of English greetings, all of which were delivered with a disgustingly cheerful inflection normally reserved only for horrible daytime children's shows. Continuing to move themselves around, the Korean teachers were eventually adjusted such that Nate, Tiffany, Susie and I were positioned directly in front of the elevator, ensuring that we were the absolute first thing that the DYB mothers would see. In turn, as they existed the elevator, I was continually reminded of my absurdly tasteless attire and beautiful lion's mane in the elevator mirror. . .this did nothing to help my already inflated ego as myself continued to wink at I in a jeering manner!
Eventually we were joined in line by two more teachers, Jun and Melanie. After a little more than half an hour of cheesing we were told to retire back to the native room to prepare our skit. . .this was no joke! We moved down the hall to an empty classroom to not only practice but develop a song and dance routine. Apparently, Queen Bee Melanie (which I will explain) had her heart set on a parody of the song Lemon Tree by Fools Underground. Now apparently if you do not know this song you're either not Korean, haven't been in Korea long enough or, simply don't care to follow the German pop scene. . . though the last excuse was my own.
Unfamiliar with the tune, as I would be amazed if you weren't, Melanie played it for us a few times before we set off on creating our own, DYB inspired lyrics. Through heated debate, and a number of my well intentioned ideas being shot down by the Queen Bee, we eventually arrived at the song as read below, sung to the tune of Lemon Tree's chorus. . .
Is improvement in their English-ee
- Team Leaders get their own DYB business cards. . .how cool!
- Blake used to be Junggye's Team Leader which makes me think it can't be too important of a position as he was fired for doing nothing, as in, he didn't give any effort to teaching, not that he was fired for something trivial.
- Winter Intensive lasts from January through Febuary and is a period where the students are out of public school and therefore in acadmey for the majority of the day (meaning so are us teachers).
- During intensive, classes are relatively the same as they are during the year except longer and they start early in the morning.
- It is okay to teach kids songs as English lessons as I did with my students in Ghana and had hoped to do here but haven't for fear of the seemingly very rigid, uncreative work environment.
- Our 'steak and wine' party on Saturday is a Native Teacher only party with a substantial cash prize for the talent show.
- A Britney Spears Christmas song cover will likely not interest the judge, Mr. Song. (see following).
- Mr. Song loves Mr. Song and DYB, meaning any and all entertainment should revolve around the two.
- The talent show for which we'll be performing the 'DYB Song' is during an all-Korean teacher party.
- The only foreign teachers allowed at the party are those that will be performing or were specifically invited. . .so far we know only of two others besides Nate and I.
- Mr. Song loves Time magazine and cites it as if it were his Bible. . .which it might be.
- Mr. Song also admires Obama, not for his platforms but for his 'work ethic.'
- If you're ever invited to a parent teacher meeting, expect to sing and dance. . .remember, you're a mascot!
- Mr. Song employs an interesting form of organizational management in which he annually rotates teachers amongst the branches, intentionally separating those that grow too close together in order to encourage productivity, or at least discourage counter productivity.
To be honest though, the most surprising thing was learning that there was an entire hierarchy of Foreign Teachers that until now, we had been wholly unaware of. Not that it changes much but it's nice to know that we do have some sort of our own superior, or at least an 'enlightened' peer whom we can turn to with any issues that may arise.
We waited around the Native Room for a bit until Melanie decided that we should break for lunch and meet back at 12:30pm as we had been reassigned to perform at 1:00pm, the time that Yumi had initially told Nate and I we would finish with the meetings. Glad to have the chance to grab a bite, Nate and I doubled checked with our new-found ranking officer then took off for downstairs. Not having the time or patience to try and decipher local Korean menus we darted across the street to Ole' MacD's. Sitting down to my feast of beef I was surprised to find my phone ringing. Crap, I thought, Mr. Lee is going to be mad because I left with his tie even though I'll be back in just a minute. Right on the first count, wrong on the second.
It was Mr. Lee calling, and he was mad, but it wasn't about the tie! Where are you, he cried. Um, getting lunch, Melanie told us to grab something to eat. But I told you I would take you to lunch (not true, he told us Yumi would take us to lunch as he would be too busy to), why you not wait for me? I'm sorry Mr. Lee, we'd love to have lunch with you but we were told to go out and get something to eat on our own. I don't care, I wanted to buy you lunch, have you ordered yet? Well thank you Mr. Lee, we would have loved to have lunch with you too but we were told to get our own food, I'm sorry, we just ordered but we can come quickly and meet you somewhere. Grumble grumble grumble, disappointed, grumble grumble, enjoy your burger, grumble grumble grumble. Good bye Mr. Lee, sorry again and thank you for the offer!
Needless to say, while the phone call ruined my mood it couldn't touch the deliciousness of my first food of the day! We finished up quickly and headed back to the (old) Main Branch where we ran into Mr. Lee on the way up. We again apologized and thanked him for the offer and he indicated it was okay but next time we would have to eat with him. . . as if we refused a free meal on purpose. I guess that's what you get for listening to your superiors right!?
Once everyone was back from lunch we again did the line up thing for fifteen minutes or so before being given about equal time to finish up practicing. While waiting to enter the room full of Korean mothers, eager for a show, Mr. Song, Time magazines in hand, turned to Melanie and asked her a question. Can you explain what a package is? As compared to a bailout? Umm, you mean, like a stimulus package? Ahh okay, well. . .I can't remember exactly what she said but it ended up being Nate who hit the nail on the head. . .all that college really did amount to something!
Mr. Song asked Melanie if she could please speak on the issue relating it to the students in DYB. Well I wasn't able to hear everything that was said, I sure empathized with Melanie when I heard her inquire as to what 'context' she should be addressed the difference between these two macroeconomic principles. While I'm not sure what Mr. Song's response was, by the time Melanie gave he speech, she had whittled away any talk of economic stimulus or bailouts. . .perhaps a good thing as we hear enough about the two on a daily basis anyways!
Mr. Song then turned to the remaining five teachers and asked who would be willing to give a short speech. Not in the mood for an oration on Time's topic of the week I shirked back just enough to avoid Jun pointing towards Tiffany, suggesting that he needn't talk because he addressed the parents last time. Fortunately, for me at least, Tiffany agreed to talk but was unsure of her topic. Mr. Song explained to her that he would be talking about the beauty of Paris and how Paris is the best city in the world because it's residents care so much about it's beauty to make everything in it so beautiful. . .this being said to a girl who claims to be from New Orleans! It was then suggested to Tiffany that she build off Mr. Song's topic. . .not quite sure what a Tiger (yep, as in a couple dozen miles up the river from the 'Naw) Alum has to say on the topic of Parisian beauty to a room full of Korean mothers but she pulled it off well. . . enough, for the impromptu situation!
We were eventually ushered into the performance room where the six of us stood on a small raised platform about twelve feet long and less than three feet wide. At Mr. Songs command (and I do mean a barked out command, no subtle indicators there) we bowed to the room full of mothers who welcomed us in. Mr. Song then called for a volunteer to speak. It took Tiffany a second before she realized that was her cue to step forward, but she nailed it. Melanie was then called upon and she two nailed whatever she said though I missed the part about the 'package' as Mr. Song first put it. While the mother filled room nodded in agreement, I question whether anyone understood anything that was said, especially when it looked like Mr. Song asked if anyone did, in Korean, and nobody seemed to reply enthusiastically.
He then turned the stage over to us asking if we knew of a way to demonstrate DYB's 'teamwork:' our cue to start dancing! A five, six, seven, eight and off we were! Though we paused just long enough after the first time through that the room erupted in applause while we were stumbling to meet up in the second 'verse,' we made it through without a hitch. Immediately following our performance we were again commanded to bow and quickly removed from everyone's sight. . .at this point it was really solidified in my mind that we were there for no other reason that to entertain and look pretty. . . mission accomplished!
With that our morning in Daechi was concluded and we packed up to go, not before I returned Mr. Lee's tie to Yumi of course! We said good bye to everyone and took off for the subway though we all eventually met up again on the short walk. By 2:25 pm we were on the way back up to Junggye to tackle our first day of teaching after our three week hiatus.
Why and how are you posting this in the middle of your work day then? Well, after preparing my lesson I entered Ana's class ready to go. . .yet no students had shown up. Today is our first day back in the classroom because only today have students finished up the last of their dozen tests they took this week (three each day for the past four days). Ana suggested to me that they might be exhausted from their tests and want to spend the day playing with friends instead of coming to academy. She then declared that we must try to understand this of the children to which I responded I could easily accept as I was once a child myself and enjoyed time with my friends after working hard. . .what I really meant is thank God that I don't have to teach for the next two hours after I've been up traveling and working for the past nine hours now! I guess I'll thank the students next time I see them!
Other than being extremely exhausted I had a rather fun time this morning. It was really good to meet a couple other interesting FT's and certainly beneficial to learn more about DYB as an organization. I also developed some greater sense of hope for possibly enjoying the position I hold as all those that we talked to seemingly do a great deal. To a large degree I envy, at least on the surface, what appears to be a really fully integrated branch that they have in Daechi. The Foreign Teachers all hang out a lot it sound like, both with each other and their Korean Teachers while class time seems to be much more laid back and enjoyed by everyone. Whether this is just my interpretation of slightly exaggerated tales or a true statement, it gives me a glimmer of hope that one day I will actually enjoy coming to work. . .other than the days where I know I'll be watching movies all after noon!
As for Junggye, well, we're still a bit isolated from Seoul city center though we have been meeting, or at least interacting with a few more people in the area. It's just not easy to have a 'social life' outside of Nate and I as there's little to do in the afternoons or evenings and then on the weekends we just try and get out to do as much as possible with out putting 'meeting others' high up on the list. . .while perhaps I should, I just can't seem to figure out how or why really! We have signed up to go on a ski/snowboard trip in late January over the Lunar New Year with a gang of 16 only one of whom we know and met only briefly on Halloween so, I'll keep ya updated on that as the date nears!
Enough on life. . .this post is about today and thankfully, it's almost over! I bet your as glad as I am that this post is too!
2 comments:
Oh my goodness. I stumbled upon your blog looking for the Korean Publication, Lemon Tree Magazine. I kept reading thinking I would get to it, and eventually was fully immersed in your day. I could not help, but laugh as I continued reading (and reading, and reading), about A) you being brought out because you were handsome b) You were told your hair looked like a lion, the bedazzled rhinestone candy cane tie you were insisted on wearing (haha!!), and then the whole dance skit.
Just a few months ago I was introduced to the world that is Korean dramas, and got hooked. I would LOVE to visit Seol someday. Sounds like you had quite the adventure there. Too bad you aren't still blogging about it. I've not perused through any other posts, so I'm assuming you are no longer there?
Anyhow, thank you for the unexpected laugh this afternoon.
:)
Hi MBL!
I'm so glad that you enjoyed reading! I have since left Korea and, as you noted, stopped contributing to the site. I've left it up as a resource for those interested in the Korean teaching adventure. Never did I think I'd offer someone a daily dose of smiles! But I'm more than happy I did!
Thanks for the comment!
-A
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